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Wednesday, April 23, 2008

I"ve been tagged by a Utah Savage!

The photo will eventually make sense... I think

Utah Savage included me in her tag. I have to write six random things about myself. Since this blog has been up for a while (far too long, some would argue), I've decided it must be six things that none of you know about me. And that they must not be too long (must earn living...must earn living) and that Utah will stop harassing me once this is posted. She is so bitter at times.

1. I once lived in an Israeli kibbutz. I was assigned to the chicken house, but protested. As a vegetarian then, I could not in good conscience, run around in the middle of the night stuffing screaming, feather-losing hens into little boxes for the butchers of Tel Aviv. Okay, it stunk too - think ammonia, fear and shit. I was re-assigned to the greenhouse, where commercial roses were grown. I was the only man there, and other than multiple thorn wounds daily, I loved it. The women had a record player on a little table. A rose house ritual: put on Frank Sinatra as loud as he will play and take turns waltzing with Gary between the rows of roses. Pinch his ass. Make fun of him in Hebrew. Make him blush. Laugh until lunch.

2. When I was about 8 I had a wart on my hand. My mother's weird friend Janet looked me in the eye, bought my wart for 25 cents (2 movies and a coke then). A couple of weeks later it disappeared and Janet showed me one of hers that she claimed was her purchase.

3. I can pick up a quarter (25 cents again!) on the tines of a forklift - no gimmicks. Put the quarter on the floor, put your bet on the tines ($5 minimum) and give me two minutes. I made 50 bucks one night in a huge Red Cross warehouse in Florida, just after Hurricane Andrew.

4. I saw a murder in New York. A gang fight swarmed out of a park into the parking lot I was just driving out of with my friend Steve. Bottles, chains, bats, knives and lots of action. Steve: "DRIVE THE FUCKING CAR! GARY! GARY! DRIVE THE FUCKING CAR!" I was in some sort of 'is this real?' shock. The death was a man hit against a wall by a car one gang member was in, just beside us. If anyone cares to offer therapy for that memory, I'm open. Apologies if I triggered yours.

5. My middle name is Frederick.

6. A very elderly woman, sitting next to me on a flight from Denver to LA, told me I reminded her of Joel Grey (remember Cabaret) and tried to seduce me. She eventually invited me to spend the night with her at her Hollywood home. I'm not telling... (okay, I passed on it - don't want nasty rumours spreading).

How's that Utah? Don't get on my case, as I'm not going to tag others. I am going to simply say that if any of you would like to list six random things about you, please tell us here and we'll come visit to enjoy your writing.

Oh my! I just fell a little in love with you. You had me at number one.

Gary, I'm sorry for the pain that number four must have caused you. I bet you've pondered why you were there at the time. When I recently witnessed a very (not similar) disturbing event, I came to the realization that there was a greater purpose for it, and that greater purposed indeed manifested itself a short time later.

So, I already posted my random confessions when I got tagged a short while back. Mine are no where near as interesting as yours, but you can read them here.
Random and fascinating. The murder you witnessed - disturbing. The seduction scene? Amusing.
I once worked in a greenhouse sorting roses. Months later the thorns were still emerging from my fingers.
Gary, I loved the rose story, what a super image, you could write an entire story about that...

I am sorry about the violence, and sorry no words of therapy except that it seems to me these things can only be a gift to prepare us for some other form of compassion somewhere else in our lives where it is really needed ...

I LOVE cabaret... it is the epidomy of all things European for me, that and my all time favorite movie, the Kiss of the Spider woman...

I LOVE that an older woman tried to pick you up.... ha, ever wonder what would have happened?

Oh...and I simply adore KD Lang, I will never forget seeing her in a gingham skirt and red cowboy boots and pigtails square dancing and belting her lungs out at an outdoor concert in Toronto...15 years ago......those were the days...

Thanks for sharing!!
Cheri - how nice to be loved, even a little! Did I tell you that I look a little like Joel Grey? As for number 4, I don't think of it too much and unfortunately, have seen some other things that are searing (working internationally).

Beth - 'later the thorns were still emerging from my fingers' - that's a metaphor for some loves too.

Nomad - nice to meet another Cabaret fan - what a time, what a film. As for the elderly seducer - yes, I could have been a boy toy in Hollywood! Maybe never worked again in my life... but I'd have felt so very soiled. :)
I loved number one. I can picture it in my head, and it's strangely sexy.

I can't even imagine what I would do if I were to witness a murder. Last summer a mafia shooting happened right down the street from where I live, in front of a store that I frequent. I wasn't there (thankfully), but knowing that someone was murdered yards away from my house freaks me out. Witnessing a murder as you did... well, that's on another level entirely.

And cool trick with the quarter. That's a pretty neat talent.
I think that you should videotape your quarter trick and post it on YouTube. I need proof!

Wow! What a wild world! Dancing your way through roses, chains, knives and old women who want you.

Thanks for taking a break from earning a living so you can give us a tour of some fun and not-so-fun points in your life.
I am utterly speechless.
Mostly because I am too tired to comment any further. Please make no fuzz about it.
Roses, seductions in greenhouses somewhere in Israel. This smells of definitely a 70's trip. Koch must have been still the brave mayor of Jerusalem, a good man.
Now it is all "kaput" - broken. Walls are being built that rival the Berlin wall. The present Kibbutz, a lost dream of yet an other angst. Weird how times do change.
Gary, my attention span is super-short these days and I am typing into this darn "Leave your comment" window. What else am I supposed to say: Hallelujah?
it's always fascinating to learn a bit of what makes people who they are. i love biographies. your story would make a most interesting one, methinks.
Gary, it took you so long I gave up nagging and almost forgot about you. Brave boy. Sorry, man, brave man. I'm still bitter, but reading your six has cheered me up a little. Now we can pour over you tidbits for the next couple of months. I liked the roses and Senatra part the best. I'll bet you did too.
murder and seduction in one post.
it's my lucky day.
the ammonia smell of chicken shit
turned to roses and music, your
lucky day.
balancing a quarter on the tip
of your tines, like Kong holding
naomi watts without maiming, her
lucky day.
getting to call you frederick
fred... er rick... er gary...
er whatever,
WOW..what an interesting life..I bet there's more though!!

WOW..what an interesting life..I bet there's more though!!

Nova - Frank is always sexy to dance to, especially on an ancient record player and roses.

Carol - yeah, but where will I find a forklift to film the trick?

Gfid and Ingrid: these are snapshots in a sometimes-quirky life album - there are many quiet times too.

Utah, thanks.

Seraphine - that is beautifu - love the tines and Kong analogy! You can call me Rick.
I know I responded to this post! Did you delete me? Seriously?

Anyway, I thought these were excellent answers, and I commented that EVERYBODY loves you, G.
AND, I'm with gfid up there. Your memoirs would make good reading.
Hey Scarlet, I don't remember seeing the comment, and certainly wouldn't delete it, especially with all the loving comments! If anyone here hasn't read some of your stories, get yourself over there and have a look. Scarlet is a great writer.
Ditto. I need YouTube proof you can pick up a quarter with a forklift.

Random stuff. Fascinating life. =)
Sarah - I need proof that your shoes aren't a digital creation! Okay, I'll work on the forklift gig if I can. Bets please!
6 things about me......

• Used to be a Forest Fire fighter. We had to be certified by the Forest Service. They had a different step test heart rate for girls. I insisted on taking both, because what does it matter to the burning mountain? Forest Fire fighting is an awful job- think burning poison oak.

• Almost drowned in the ocean by Sana Cruz.
I am an avid swimmer, I'd never experienced a rip tide, first hand. I was out swimming in the ocean on a hot, sunny day, when I realized the beach was getting further away- really really further. I tried swimming back & was not making headway. I remembered to swim sideways to get out of the rip tide. Obviously, I'm still around to tell the story.

• I once got lost in the Sierra Mountains. Out on a week long backpacking hike, somewhere took a wrong turn. Someone had been putting weird yard ornaments up in the remote areas of the Sierras, at very high elevations. Yard gnomes, pink flamingos it was pretty funny really, to run into these anomalies out in the middle of nowhere. Saw some real bears munching berries as well. Eventually, I was found.

• I was working in a funky job & they required us to write self evaluations. I insisted they put in writing "Fran is a damned good employee" & they did!

• I called in to the high school to excuse my Son's absence for the day. He was working on a "living history project" was going to do civil disobedience in protest of the Iraq war & planned on getting arrested. By the way, the kid graduated with Honors.

• I graduted in the bicentennial year-- the school admin decided to get red, white & blue grad cap tassles (they exploited the bicentennial shamelessly). I showed up with a rainbow tassle instead. The commercialized patriotism was not going to be forced on me.
See, it was worth the effort wasn't it? Who knows, I might have been that older woman--always did have a soft spot for Joel. So Fredrick dear, we should do this more often.
That was great!
We have many a chicken house in this area and I know the smell. I would have refused too. There was once a story in the local paper of an old woman who raised chickens. She had one of those enourmous block long chicken houses. Every square inch of those things are filled with chickens. Anyway somehow she fell and couldn't get up and was trapped in the chicken house for 48 hours. Nightmare.
Gary, why in the world would you think my shoes are a digital creation?

Bets... I'll throw in "the" quarter! If you prove you can pick it up with a forklift, I'll divulge the story about my sister I've never met. =)

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